(Edited journal excerpt from April 1991)
1O God, you are my God, earnestly I seek you; my soul thirsts for you, my body longs for you, in a dry and weary land where there is no water. Lord, You really are my God. I am coming to seek you as earnestly as I know how. My soul is thirsty for You alone. Even my body aches to know You more deeply. This parched place through which I journey only intensifies my longings. I am not finding refreshment or satisfaction anywhere else. You are my only hope right now. Has this been Your plan? Is this desert the place where You bring focus and clarity to my desire, realizing that it is You alone that I want?
2I have seen you in the sanctuary and beheld your power and your glory. From this desert place, I can easily remember times when I’ve sensed Your presence, felt Your power and was humbled by Your overwhelming glory. I remember the intimacy of Your presence in those private, holy places. I have known moments when I that there was no one and nothing in the world but You and me. This increases my longing for You.
3Because your love is better than life, my lips will glorify you. Can I say this with the same conviction as David? Do I really believe that Your love is better than life itself? Or do I love my life more than I want Your love? What might I be devoting myself to over You? When I realize that nothing in my life, not even my life itself, is better than Your unfailing love, I see You filling the whole horizon of my vision. I am enabled to glorify you, acknowledge Your great honor, praise and glory.
4I will praise you as long as I live, and in your name I will lift up my hands. I am learning that You are always and will always be more than worthy of my puny praise, no matter what may come. Thank You for the challenges I face that deepen this conviction. I must often provoke You in my ignorance and presumption. When I think of Your name, I will lift my hands to praise You, Father.