Tag Archives: Spiritual Direction

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A Cure for Common Depression


“It is probable that the commonest of human ills is depression, and almost invariably depression has its roots in a field of vision entirely circumscribed by self. There is no cure that is better or quicker than the application of humour, which reduces what is seen to its right proportions, and extends the vision to a wider and more wholesome view.” (Morgan, Edmund R. Reginald Somerset Ward: His Life and Letters. London: A. R. Mowbray & Co., Ltd, 1963, p. 105.)

I don’t think Ward is talking about what we would see as chemical causes of depression. He speaks of the variety that is the fruit of a certain way of thinking or perspective. I have suffered often from such depression. In this place, Ward’s counsel proves helpful to me.

I become depressed when my field of vision is limited to my own thoughts, feelings, or experiences. In that small, self-conscious space, my thoughts often become more negative and dark. Humor has often been a way of opening up my perspective a bit to realize that my negative thoughts are not, in fact, the universe. They are simply thoughts. (I have not reached Bernard of Clairvaux’s fourth level of love in which we love ourselves for God’s sake. I long to think in such a way so as to see and value myself through the loving eyes of Jesus).

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More Fruits of Solitude


Bethlehem, Church of the NativityOne of my favorite ministry opportunities is providing what a mentor, Wayne Anderson, called “EPC”s (Extended Personal Communion with God). I wrote about this in chapter 10 of An Unhurried Life. Recently, I led a day like this with a group of leaders. After a few hours alone and quiet with God, we came back together to debrief our experiences.

As I was listening to the creative and unique ways that God had been present to each one, I realized that what I enjoy far more than being a speaker or presenter is being a facilitator of vital encounters with Jesus. This skill is not so much about putting words together in a way that is entertaining, interesting or captivating. (I won’t discount that God often gives me a one-liner that seems to help others, but I enjoy those more when they come in an interactive moment rather than in a one-way lecture).

I really feel I’m at my best in those interactive moments like a debrief. Someone shares a story of their encounter with God, and a thought comes that seems to help put that encounter into some context, or helps others identify with and enter into it. It is these encounters and this interaction that seems to be a catalyst for people actually practicing the presence of Jesus rather than talking about his practice.

I like having unhurried time and space like a retreat where people open more to God, then I can come along and help them more deeply understand and appreciate those encounters.

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Here’s a practical insight that came during this particular debrief. One of the participants shared that they felt drawn to begin fasting. I shared that when we practice disciplines of “not doing” something, like solitude (no company), silence (no conversation), fasting (no eating), secrecy (no seeking recognition for our good ) or simplicity (no unnecessary spending), it causes our desires to become focused. When the desire for conversation inevitably surfaces in the midst of silence, I can say, “I do want conversation, but I want Jesus more.” Or in solitude, I can say, “I do want company, but I want Jesus more.”

In fasting, this is where I learn deeply that we do not live only by the bread we eat, but by everything God communicates to us. “I do want food, but I want Jesus more.” Disciplines of abstinence bring focus to our desires. When I find my desires scattered here and there, it may be good to ask which disciplines of disengagement is Jesus inviting me to practice to bring focus to my desires.

 

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Following Jesus Into Solitude


IMG_1066One of the writers who has provided me rich counsel in cultivating Jesus’s own rhythm of work and rest has been Elton Trueblood (1900-1994). Below is my paraphrase of a quotation from his book, The Lord’s Prayers (1965).

At times, Jesus would invite His disciples away from the demands of ministry and take them with Him alone and quiet in retreat. The gospel of Mark shows Jesus inviting them: “Come with me by yourselves to a quiet place and get some rest (Mark 6:31).” Is there any better rationale than this for busy people in serving, healing, teaching and ministering professions getting away for regular times of retreat? These times of stepping away are no sign of failure or actual loss, but are an opportunity to regather resources for the good work given us by God. We return to the work of ministry renewed, revitalized and ready again. Such a rhythm results in greater progress than is produced by continual labor. Every busy person should see their lives in chapters. Some chapters involve active and hard work. Other chapters involve rest and preparation. In our hectic, busy world, it grows harder to find times and places to be alone and quiet with God, but it is still possible. Such a rhythm requires significant personal leadership and a conscious, deliberate plan. The rhythm of times away from our work enables us to bring far more to our work when we return. Being released from the pressure to produce, impress others or “be on” can be an enormous relief.

UnhurriedLife_smBy the way, my book, An Unhurried Life: Following Jesus’ Rhythms of Work and Rest (IVP, June 2013), is now available for preorder on Amazon. And in case you’d be interested in the original Trueblood quotation, here it is:

“Sometimes Christ separated the Apostles from the strain of human encounter by taking them apart with Him, when their need was sufficient. “And he said to them, ‘Come away by yourselves to a lonely place, and rest a while’” (Mark 6:31). Here is the support for the requirement that busy people, especially those in the serving, healing, and teaching occupations, should engage in. periodic retreats. These withdrawals do not involve failure, or any backward motion, but rather a gathering of resources for renewed encounter. They are really advances rather than retreats. Every busy life should be lived in chapters, including chapters devoted to work and chapters devoted to preparation for work. With the world‑wide increase in population, the experience of absolute solitude is becoming daily more difficult, but for most of us it is still possible, providing it is included in a conscious and deliberate plan. Most people in public life would accomplish far more if each could have one week in the year when he does not see even one other human being. The relief from having to impress, or even to please, is potentially healing.” (Trueblood, Elton. The Lord’s Prayers. New York: Harper & Row, Publishers, 1965, p. 30.)

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Spiritual Formation: The Work of the Spirit


IMG_2866“It helps me to make a rough distinction between “religion” and “spirituality.” By religion I mean the efforts that we make to keep things together in a somewhat orderly fashion, to maintain some sense of responsibility before God. By spirituality I mean the work of the Holy Spirit in making Jesus alive in us, inciting us to acts of love and compassion, blessing us with his gifts, bringing us to our knees in repentance and up on our feet in wonder. Religion is mostly a matter of what we do; spirituality is mostly a matter of what God does. My own practice has been to keep my involvement in religion to a responsible minimum‑my participation in spirituality (in the Spirit!) extravagantly maximal.” (Peterson, Eugene. The Wisdom of Each Other. Grand Rapids: ZondervanPublishingHouse, 1998, p. 96.)

My experience with the word “religion” is almost completely negative in tone. It’s a word that has meant “God activities without relationship with God.” It would be better to call that “empty religion,” since James says that there is a true religion that produces actual change in character and genuine care for those in greatest need (James 1:27).

      Peterson opts to use “religion” as a more neutral word to describe our actions or initiatives related to God, and “spirituality” for the initiatives and acts of the Holy Spirit. Peterson’s focus is to continually direct his attention to spirituality, seeking to notice and cooperate with the initiatives and acts of the Spirit, rather than to become engrossed in his own God-related activities (that can so easily become God-disconnected). I find myself continually tempted to be far more aware of all my “doings” rather than learning to live attentively to the works of the Father. 

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Becoming Like Little Children


Jesus tells us that only those who come like little children will enter the kingdom of God. I’ve heard so many ideas about what that actually means. Here’s one I found helpful:

“It becomes very evident why our Lord tells us to become as little children (Mt 18:3), and what is involved in it; we can see how it is related to the theme of vacate, taking a break from being God, to let him be God. Little children do not have piles of important correspondence on their desks, nor rows of shiny telephones to handle all their important business transactions. Becoming as a little child means unlearning the false solemnity of adolescence, unlearning the false maturity and self-importance of ideology and puritanism. It means forgetting to run the world, forgetting to run one another’s lives. It means forgetting even to run our own lives.” (Tugwell, Simon. Prayer: Living With God. Springfield: Templegate Publishers, 1975, p. 39.)

So Tugwell highlights that aspect of children where they recognize their non-responsibility, but not irresponsibility. Children are not self-important nor self-sufficient. They don’t tend to think more highly of themselves than is supported by circumstances. It isn’t until later childhood and adolescence that self-importance seems to surface. Children rarely think of themselves as being responsible for the world around them like adults tend to do.

Father, how are You inviting me to resign from my pretending to be You? How are You wishing for me to find freedom from my own ideas, my own rules, my own imagined kingdom? How will I welcome Your way of life to reign in me? How will this find fruitful expression in the practical engagements of my life?

Here are a few past posts on the same theme:

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Soul Prayers and Situation Prayers


Gem and I outside the Peju Winery just north of Napa, CA.

I’ve been thinking about how we ask for prayer and how pray for others. Two categories I’ve been wondering about is what I’m calling “situational prayers” and “soul prayers.” Situational prayers are requests related to requests to change, improve or affect circumstances around us or others. We want healing, better finances, better relationships. There are plenty of situational prayers in the scripture where a king prays for God’s favor in battle against an enemy, or Paul asks others to pray that he will be delivered from the evil one, for example. Soul prayers are requests related to change and growth in our lives. Soul prayers get to the heart, so to speak, of our condition. I think of so many of the prayers of Paul in his letters. For example:

“And this is my prayer: that your love may abound more and more in knowledge and depth of insight, so that you may be able to discern what is best and may be pure and blameless for the day of Christ, filled with the fruit of righteousness that comes through Jesus Christ—to the glory and praise of God” (Phil 1:9-11 NIV).

Paul prays for mutual love to grow in experience of Jesus and in deepening insight. He asks that this would result in clearer discernment and a well-focused life that is rich in the ways and character of Jesus. In my experience, many of our requests for the prayers of others tend to be more situational than soulish. I don’t mean to create an “either/or” here. I would like to offer both kinds of prayers for others, and receive them for myself.

For Reflection: Which kind of praying would you say dominates your way of praying for others? What kind of prayer do you find yourself asking for from others?

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Spiritual Direction: Pointing to Another


“The point of spiritual direction is to bring about greater freedom, not greater constraint. What I shall try to do is to help you to make decisions. I do not exist as a prop, as someone who conveniently makes decisions for you. Direction can all too easily limit freewill instead of providing a more Godward, and therefore a greater, range for its exercise.” (van Zeller, Hubert. Letters to a Soul. Springfield: Templegate Publishers, 1976, p. 7.)

Spiritual direction is about helping people enter more deeply and fully into the freedom that is already theirs in Jesus. God wants us to live freely and lightly. He really does! He does not wish our lives to become more and more burdened by responsibilities. Spiritual direction is, in this way, not unlike any physical discipline. We commit ourselves to a particular course of training that is in some way limiting in the moment so as to be more free to do or be something in particular. Spiritual direction or any kind of spiritual mentoring is not about creating dependence in the mentoree or directee, but about cultivating freedom.

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Spiritual Direction: Sharing Experienced Grace


“What will equip the spiritual guide for [their] work more than anything is [their] own persevering prayer and [their] own personal struggle with the forces of darkness, and [the] effort to bring under the sway of the Spirit the untamed energies of [their] own being. The study of the Christian tradition of the spiritual life, especially the acknowledged masters of prayer, will enlarge the store of wisdom from which [they] can draw. The study of modern psychology will help to provide a contemporary language which makes ancient wisdom bright and new. [Christopher Bryant, SSJE]” (Peter Ball. Anglican Spiritual Direction. Boston: Cowley Publications, 1998, p. 142.)

This echoes the practical experience of the desert fathers who went off into the wilderness to wrestle with their demons. I have found that the regular practice of solitude (as well as the help of a therapeutic process) to be very fruitful in my own struggle. As I overcome my own demons, I gain practical wisdom and clearer vision of how to help others on a similar journey. I cease to give “theoretical grace”, and now find I have “experienced grace” to share.

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Conversations Journal Blog: August Guest Post


My monthly article on the Conversations Journal blog has posted. This month, the focus has been to share three things we’ve learned from our spiritual directors. Click below to read my post:

“Three Gifts” post

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The Fiery Power of Redeemed Passion


“From beyond all place and time, out of the very Place, authority will be given you: the strengths that once opposed your will shall be obedient fire in your blood and heavenly thunder in your voice. Overcome us that, so overcome, we may be ourselves: we desire the beginning of your reign as we desire dawn and dew, wetness at the birth of light.” (C.S. Lewis. The Great Divorce. New York: MacMillan Publishing Co., Inc., 1946, p. 104.)

God intends to redeem and harness the powerful passions in me for His kingdom purposes. Often though, the powerful creative urge in me has been bent so that I am tempted to misdirect and misuse it.

How do I respond to this bent? Sometimes I deny those passions. Perhaps I pretend they aren’t there. But like any unacknowledged source of pressure, it will eventually find a way out. And having come from places of hiding, it won’t likely be good. At other times, I may follow the bent direction of these passions, injuring myself and others.

These two responses are both false. The faithful response is to welcome God’s healing, redeeming work so that “the strengths that once opposed your will shall be obedient fire in your blood and heavenly thunder in your voice.” I long for my life and my work to be moved by the fiery power of redeemed passion.

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(Repost from June 2009)